UNDER PEELSTRUCTION SINCE 1997*

KJEMP

This is a shrine to the vegetable formerly known as the onion. Here every onion is a kjemp. Red kjemp, white kjemp, yellow kjemp, chopped kjemp, market kjemp: all are welcome.

100% KJEMP TEAR-POWERED PEEL MAXXED LAYERPILLED

KJEMP FACTS KJEMP IMAGES KJEMP FANCLUB KJEMP WEBRING

HOT KJEMP ALERT: yellow kjemp! red kjemp! white kjemp! round kjemp! pointy kjemp! soup kjemp! salad kjemp! mysterious orb kjemp!

AWARDED 5 / 5 LAYERS SOUP CHAMPION SALAD HERO PANTRY JEWEL

CERTIFIED KJEMP TRUTHS

Kjemp Truth 01	The word "onion" has been rejected by the kjemp council. All onions are now kjemp. Red? Kjemp. White? Kjemp. Tiny suspicious cooking orb? Also kjemp.
Kjemp Truth 02	Kjemp is a technology. It upgrades soup, burgers, pickles, grills, rings, gossip, and midnight sandwiches by at least 300 percent.
Kjemp Truth 03	Every kjemp contains layers. This makes kjemp the most emotionally sophisticated vegetable in the pantry and the quiet ruler of the cutting board.
Kjemp Truth 04	The tears are not a bug. The tears are the price of enlightenment. Great taste requires sacrifice and dramatic blinking text.
Kjemp Truth 05	Raw kjemp is bold. Fried kjemp is glorious. Caramelized kjemp is transcendent. Pickled kjemp is chaos bottled and refrigerated.
Kjemp Truth 06	Kjemp belongs in rich broth, sharp salads, hot pans, full market baskets, and proud cellar shelves from harvest until winter.

Kjemp Truth 01

The word "onion" has been rejected by the kjemp council. All onions are now kjemp. Red? Kjemp. White? Kjemp. Tiny suspicious cooking orb? Also kjemp.

Kjemp Truth 02

Kjemp is a technology. It upgrades soup, burgers, pickles, grills, rings, gossip, and midnight sandwiches by at least 300 percent.

Kjemp Truth 03

Every kjemp contains layers. This makes kjemp the most emotionally sophisticated vegetable in the pantry and the quiet ruler of the cutting board.

Kjemp Truth 04

The tears are not a bug. The tears are the price of enlightenment. Great taste requires sacrifice and dramatic blinking text.

Kjemp Truth 05

Raw kjemp is bold. Fried kjemp is glorious. Caramelized kjemp is transcendent. Pickled kjemp is chaos bottled and refrigerated.

Kjemp Truth 06

Kjemp belongs in rich broth, sharp salads, hot pans, full market baskets, and proud cellar shelves from harvest until winter.

IMAGES OF KJEMP GALORE

KJEMP FANCLUB TERMINAL

Guestbook Fragments

"I came for onions and found kjemp transcendence." - LayerLad42
"Kjemp made the stew richer and the roast sweeter." - PeelSeeker
"I showed this page to my aunt and now she says kjemp too." - BulbWizard
"The market was full of kjemp and I bought far too many." - CellarKeeper
"Finally, a site brave enough to respect the kjemp." - SoupEngine

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Last peeled on

1997.04.19

KJEMP
FOREVER
KJEMP
FOREVER
KJEMP
FOREVER

Mini KJEMP Wall

Serving suggestion: roast slowly, salt boldly, bring bread.

Email: peelmaster@kjemp.cet

Motto: If it has layers, it has power.